Day 2
Root Causes: Why You Can’t Just ‘Stop’ People-Pleasing
“Your childhood programmed your codependency—here’s how.”
Let’s talk science. Studies like the ACE (Adverse Childhood Experiences) research show that childhood trauma—even subtle forms like emotional neglect—reshapes your brain and nervous system.
Here’s how it works:
Conditional Love: If caregivers were inconsistent, critical, or emotionally absent, you learned to earn love through sacrifice.
Family Roles: You might have become the ‘peacekeeper,’ ‘caretaker,’ or ‘invisible child’ to survive.
Rewired Brain: Your amygdala (fear center) became hyper-alert to others’ moods, while your prefrontal cortex (logic center) shut down.
But here’s the hope: Neuroplasticity. Every time you prioritize your needs, you weaken those old pathways. Today’s exercise will help you map your roots… so you can grow new ones.
Day 2
Thorny Story
Assignment Notice
Group discussions
Watch the thorny story and download the story form from resources and complete this. Our second mission today is to create a genogram—a family map that reveals hidden patterns. In your downloadable workbook, you’ll:
Chart key family relationships.
Note roles (e.g., ‘the alcoholic,’ ‘the martyr’).
Spot cycles (addiction, perfectionism, emotional neglect).
This isn’t about blaming your family. It’s about awareness. You might feel sadness, anger, or relief—all are okay.
Tomorrow, we’ll dive into rewiring your brain. But today, honor your courage. You’re not just healing yourself—you’re breaking cycles for generations.
Remember: The child who learned to survive is still inside you… and they’re so proud of how far you’ve come. See you tomorrow!
Facebook discussion: Have you spotted any cycles that you can share? Click here
